In a Good Way, I Hope

I finally received my student evaluations for last semester's Environmental Ethics class and was very pleased with how the students rated the course and my teaching.

I'm glad the ratings were good. Otherwise this comment might have not been very flattering:

"Professor __________ is an expert on everything." 

In Which I Contemplate the Legal Profession

This paragraph recently appeared in an article in Student Lawyer magazine about how women can "break the glass ceiling" in law practice. (Full article here.)

Without going into a detailed analysis of the article, I have to say there was one paragraph that stood out for me.

4. Be seen as single-minded—even during personal or family time. “You have to figure out ways to live your life while at all times sending clients the message that their problems are your problems and you’ll be on top of them,” says Lamm. “If you’re taking a child to a doctor and you go out to the waiting room to call a client, the client doesn’t have to know that. No one’s telling you not to have a life. You should have a great life, and a family’s part of that. It’s learning how to manage your life.” (emphasis mine)

It seems to me there are so many ways this is wrong.

The client might not know you left your sick child alone in the exam room while taking their call, but won't the child know?

If your client expects your full attention while you're dealing with their problem, shouldn't you give your child the same level of attention?

Is this what the male lawyers do when they are on the golf course or at a bar, or maybe at the doctor with their sick child?

"Deserving of a Wider Audience," Indeed

Sometimes things are just too doggone good not to share.

My most recent example comes from the fabulous blog Letters of Note and has nearly all of the elements that make for good reading: superb writing, the kind of intelligent cleverness that makes me think "Gosh, I wish I'd thought of that," and the come-uppance of someone who very much deserves it (bonus: who also happens to be a lawyer).

Click here for the whole deal: Steve, I've Got News

Well played, Ms. Klemt!

Easy Choice

Typically, with my schedule, I am supposed to be in two places at once on Saturday morning. But this time, it's easy to decide where to be. After all, how often do certain of your friends and acquaintances graduate from law school? Once in a lifetime, my friends, once in a lifetime.

Texas

I've been so disorganized that I never posted about my weekend in Texas a few weeks back. I visited my very brave friend who is battling cancer. As if that wasn't enough, during the same timeframe as her treatments she has also--through courage and sheer determination--managed to finish law school, pass the bar exam, and start her law practice.

Not only is she the bravest person I know, she has maintained her sense of humor through the most trying of times. For example, she says that one of the best things about being thin, fragile, and without your usual brown/grey halo of hair (all thanks to the chemo) is that when you show up for a hearing in your hat, whatever judge is presiding that day is extremely likely to move your case right to the top of the docket. You and your client never have to wait around for your turn, and no other lawyer present dares to object.

Here's the courthouse in Llano, where such things occur:

Llano is an adorable small town and I would have loved to explore it in depth. As it was, we had a delicious down-home breakfast at the local diner, the Hungry Hunter. It's right across the street from a place where, after you get your deer, you can drop it off at any hour of the day or night via a kind of self-service meat locker system, and they will dress it for you. Not a problem I ever expect to have, but I guess where there's a need, there's a service to take care of it.

Here's main street in Llano on a Sunday morning.

Texas, as you may have heard, has a very high opinion of itself, but also a sense of humor. In the women's bathroom at the Austin airport, for example, the mirror is engraved with a motto:

Reality -- Texas -- Fantasy

I took this to mean that Texas is somewhere between fantasy and reality. Just in case you ladies need a little reminder about your special Texan place in the universe while you're primping, right?

The mirror was also engraved with the outlines of various "faceless" hairstyles at varying heights. If you stood in the right place, your reflection could "try on" what you looked like with beauty-queen-style big hair, a beehive, pigtails, or another style that might suit your fancy. That part was very cool.

I wish I'd taken a picture, but the restroom was quite busy and I'd have felt a little weird getting out my camera. No telling how lady Texans would react to such foolishness. The last thing I wanted was to have to (figuratively) shoot my way out of town. I suspect they would have been a match for me, with Barbara Jordan as a role model. She's a presence in the Austin airport, too.

Seems like Texas has a tradition of being home to courageous, accomplished women. Like my friend.

Oh, So THAT'S Why I Gained Weight in Law School

New brain research has found that when your brain is overloaded, it's hard to make good choices. I heard about this twice, once on Radiolab and once on Fresh Air. (Yes, I'm a huge NPR geek.) If it's really true, it sure explains a lot.

Subjects were given a number to remember; then they were supposed to walk down the hall to another room and tell the person in that room the number. While they were walking down the hall, they were stopped by a person who offered them a snack choice, a decadent slice of chocolate cake or a "responsible" fruit salad.

Turns out the longer the number (meaning the more complicated the task), the more likely they were to choose the chocolate cake. If they had a two-digit number, fruit salad for them. If they had a seven-digit number? Chocolate cake all the way. The discrepancy was off the scale, in research terms: twice as often.

(No word at this point about whether everyone actually liked both fruit salad and chocolate cake. Or whether there was a male/female difference. Or whether people chose the cake because it was the first choice offered. Or whether anyone responded with my first impulse: "Don't talk to me, you idiot! I'm trying to remember this ginormous number until I get to room 2.")

So they think they've proved that it's much harder to exercise "willpower" when your brain is "overwhelmed" with information. Not enough processing power left in the old noggin.

I'm not sure I buy that, but it's really interesting. It does tend to explain why I am barely fitting into my pre-law school clothes.

(Photo of cake courtesy of Southern Living magazine, although they don't actually know it. If you're trying to remember lots of information today, the recipe is available here.)

Zipped Lips Preserve Bookclubs

I'm the newest member, this was my third meeting, and I am still meeting members who weren't there before. The first meeting was such a stimulating experience, I worried afterwards that maybe I had talked too much in my rush of enthusiasm for "lit talk" with very smart, very insightful readers.

I certainly didn't mean to dominate the conversation. But I made a mental note to remember my classroom mantra: "Don't be a gunner,* no matter how much you enjoy the material." The corollary to this is "Don't drink too much coffee before class."

Last meeting I met a member who hadn't attended the first meeting. This person has quite a "big" personality. But I figured that, as the leader of that meeting, she was doing her bit to keep the discussion lively.

This past meeting she was not the leader, but did a lot of the talking anyway. I thought this dampened the contributions of other members who are not so outgoing. Often her insights were helpful, but after she launched her opinion one too many times for my taste, I was tempted to say "And I think it's dangerous to project one's own views of male-female relationships onto characters in literature and then present them as gospel." **

But I didn't say that. I also remembered that someone famous--or at least someone very wise--pointed out that the things we dislike most in others are often the things we dislike most in ourselves.

Food for thought, that.

*In law school, gunners are those eager beaver, goody-two-shoes types who raise their hand to answer every question. If you are interested, I will write a post in defense of gunners, who actually serve a valuable classroom function. Let me know!

**We read Grace Paley's short story "An Interest in Life," for anyone who must know. Good stuff: a very funny and insightful character study.

Recurring Themes

One of the most interesting stories I heard from my professors over the years was a story about lions.

The professor, an accomplished trial lawyer, invited his (very impressive) senior partner to guest lecture one night in Insurance Law. At the end of the class, the senior partner told us a "bedtime story," entirely appropriate for a class of nontraditional students who were just finishing class at 9:30 p.m. (It was a story about monkeys, which I will save for another day.)

We reported the senior partner's story with such enthusiasm that our professor promised to tell us a story of his own the last night of class. Sure enough, on the last night, after the exam review, we all settled back in our seats and he told us a story about lions.

When the pride of lions goes hunting, he said, the young lions do all the chasing and killing, tiring themselves out and risking injury if the prey puts up a fight. Even though the old lions haven't done much to help, they share the food, because the old lions have one important thing to contribute. (I have no idea if this is actually true, but as a story, it works.)

Say the pride spots a herd of antelope. The young lions hide in the bushes and wait. The old lions circle around to the other side of the herd and then begin to make a terrible roar. They are old and slow and creaky and toothless, but they can still make a fearsome noise. And the antelope get scared and run away from the old lions, right into the sharp teeth and claws of the young, strong lions. The moral of the story is: Run toward the roar.

I heard another version of this story at a business lecture the other night. The speaker's first job was as a meter reader for the city. This was a great job except for one thing: he was afraid of dogs. Not a good phobia for a meter reader! On his first day on the job, he asked a very experienced coworker how to cope with any fierce dogs on his route. The coworker told him that when he encountered a barking dog, he should walk toward the dog. He said nine times out of ten, the dog would back down, and the tenth dog would bite him.

Other details from the lecture have faded, but that story stands out clear as can be, and so does the lion story. Funny how that works. Guess I'm still an English major at heart.

101 Update

It's time for a progress evaluation of my "101 Things in 1001 Days" self-challenge. I started it November 28 and didn't report anything in December, mostly because I didn't exactly get off to a roaring start, with the holidays and all. I had pretty good focus in January, but my concentration has tailed off recently as I've been consumed by preparing for a big work event coming up February 9-10.

Over the last week, everything I've been working on has been due NOW. There are only so many NOWs to go around before my personal life gets put on hold about 20 hours of the day. Then I use the remaining 4 hours for sleep, and start all over again. Fortunately, I learned how to do this in law school. (At the time, who knew even that part was a useful lesson?)

I'll be back on track soon. Meanwhile, here's what's happened so far:

3. Eat breakfast daily. (46 times, ongoing, and could be more if a handful of Hershey's kisses counted; can I get a ruling on that?)

13. Do a secret good deed for someone. (my neighbors left their bagged trash outside their door for an entire day; instead of giving it the stink eye, I carried it down and threw it in the dumpster, 1/3/09)

18. Donate to a cat charity. (Space Coast Feline Network, 12/7/08)

27. Knit a scarf. (Signed up for class and bought yarn 12/30/08, took class 1/10/09, enjoyed every minute, haven't touched it since so . . . ongoing . . . sort of)

28. Spruce up Little George's gravesite with pavers. (added pavers and flowers with C.S.'s help, 1/5/09)

41. Weed out my closet. (1/1/09, now I need to go shopping)

54. Join a food co-op. (12/29/08, but have only placed one order so far)

58. Try habanero cheese. (this one's a keeper, 12/23/08)

67. Tour the gardens at Leu Gardens. (and posted about it, 12/28/08)

68. Enter a contest. ("Win a Trip to the Inauguration," 12/31/08)

97. Make a real budget! (past "budgets" have meant paying the bills and spending what's left, but now I actually know how much I should be spending each week, a big improvement in keeping myself financially oriented and ensuring I don't have, as the saying goes, too much month left at the end of the money, 1/19/09)

There's Always Money for Books

I have been tiptoeing around, financially speaking, for about a month now, knowing that in February I will have the pleasure of starting to pay back the money I borrowed for law school. It was pretty easy to borrow, I must say. Waiting to hear the monthly payment number has not been so easy. With a 6-month grace period, an uncomfortably long wait for reliable employment, some juggling of the repayment terms, and consideration of whether I qualified for any kind of reduction or further deferment, I never knew the exact payment amount until just a few days ago. Tonight I reformulated my budget, and wonder of wonders, I may actually be able to pay it!

I'm only half joking about being "fortunate" enough to pay. Quite a few of my fellow graduates have not found work, which must be truly excruciating. Even the fact that loans can be completely deferred doesn't ease the pain of hard work and high achievement in law school for 3 or 4 years, followed by the discovery that the market for new lawyers has dried up. So I am fully aware that I am darn lucky to be able to make payments. As for the fact that I'll enjoy this privilege for the rest of my life . . . so what? It's only money.

Speaking of enjoyment, C.S. and I enjoyed a whirlwind trip to St. Petersburg that contained many of our favorite things:

1. Two wonderful bookstores (Haslam's New & Used Books and Mojo Books & Music--and let me just say, their websites are totally inadequate for communicating how fabulous they both are!);

2. Two memorably low-key and delicious meals (Junior's Diner for breakfast before we hit the road, where we had the Best Bacon-Eggs-Sausage-Pancakes-Biscuits & Gravy Breakfast Ever, cooked by Junior himself, and El Cap's for a burger and fries lunch after we arrived); and

3. A late night drink at the historic, beautiful Vinoy hotel bar. (These are Marriott promotional photos, not taken by me--though I wish they were!)

And no, there was nothing creepy about the hotel at all. We stayed on the mezzanine level and although I generally think mezzanines are prime territory for spooky occurrences (something about being between floors), I never had a scary moment. If I had to guess, any ghosts are pleased to see the old place bustling with activity and looking so good (Marriott photo, again). The lobby includes a very professionally presented history of the hotel, from its heyday in the 1920's, its slow slide into total disrepair in the 1970's (room rates fell to $7.00 per night before it was shuttered and nearly abandoned to demolition), and its multi-million dollar restoration to its former glory in the 1990's.

I managed to escape without buying any touristy souvenirs, but I scooped up a trio of nice books: a new copy of The Gathering (the 2007 Man Booker winner) at Haslam's and two trade paperback-to-hardcover upgrades at Mojo, The Feast of Love and The Blind Assassin, both in "fine" condition for $8.99 each. No matter what twists and turns my budget takes, there's always money for books!

Worst Joke Maybe Ever

C.S. is on his way to Las Vegas and I'm slated for an office day, culminating with my first experience administering a law school exam. (In case you're wondering: Yes, I will so enjoy giving an exam instead of taking it.) And in a pre-flight phone call, C.S. informed me that if he goes to the craps table tonight, that will make us "Proctor and Gamble."

The Opposite of Nesting

Nesting is making a cozy home by gathering things together, right? I'm busy doing the opposite, in kind of a mid-fall rite of passage to mark my transition into the world as a lawyer. I tossed all my law school notes. I culled my fiction collection (and posted over 100 books on PaperBackSwap.com for others to browse and request). I cleaned out the refrigerator. I even scrubbed, dusted and vacuumed my apartment, so this is some serious stuff.

It feels good to lighten the load as I enter this new phase. I'm thoroughly enjoying my work in Earth Jurisprudence, and sending many good thoughts into the universe for the funding that will transform it into a full-time job. Today I formally agreed to be a Writing Coach to graduate students at a local college. I know I will love that, and perhaps it will lead to other creative things, or other teaching work. This weekend I'm making a budget that reflects the financial realities of my new life, with an eye toward those looming student loan payments.

Many years ago a palm reader told me I would have two lives. Apparently my life line breaks and then resumes as it crosses my palm. Whenever I experience major life changes, I always wonder, "Is this it? Is this my second life?"

From what I have been through, I may have already started my second life long ago. Really, how can I be sure what's a change and what's a continuation of what came before? Isn't everything really both a change and a continuation? But if I haven't already started my second life, I'm definitely starting it now.

Box O'Books

Now that the results are official, it's time to let go of our bar prep books. Almost everyone I know has been keeping them handy, even though the exam was nearly two months ago. Here's what one of my friends had to say about it:

I notice – I have not yet gotten myself to actually take my big plastic crate out of the trunk of my car – the one that holds all my law books, notebooks, etc. It’s funny, I’ve been carrying around this crate for four years – and - it seems that it will take a “you passed” note from the Florida Bar to get me to remove it from my car. I only remember when I do the grocery shopping. I pop the trunk – and each time – find myself standing in the parking lot for a few extra minutes – shaking my head. Then, I move the crate over – and load the groceries. Maybe this is some kind of a sickness? I cannot let it go. It’s as if I want to have my books/notes available at all times – just in case. What if I get stranded on the road somewhere – you know – a flat or something – and have to kill time – wouldn’t it be prudent of me to use that time to study? - Shouldn’t I study? .....you know, just in case? As every day goes by – I feel what little law I had – is drifting out of my head – like the steam on a hot road right after a summer shower. Was the “rule against perpetuities” the name of a cartoon? I’m even thinking about driving to Tampa – just to walk around the convention center a couple of times – to keep myself – you know – fresh – in preparation of the inevitable. I see a phobia developing here.

This person was not kidding. But now that the "you passed" news has arrived, we can finally let go of our books and our worries.

I, on the other hand, returned my bar prep books the same week as the exam. I did that during law school, too: the day after my last exam each semester, I went to the bookstore, sold back my books, and bought the next semester's books. Confidence? No way. Pure superstition. I did it the first semester in a burst of efficiency, and after that I never wanted to pass up a chance to keep the Fates on my side. Especially for the bar exam!

A Brand New Day

Bar results are up and I passed! What a fantastic feeling of pride and relief! Swearing in will be next week, just to give it time to sink in!

I'm so grateful to everyone who suffered through four years of law school and six intense weeks of bar prep with me, especially C.S. (who was here for the big moment when the results came up on-line). Really and truly, I couldn't have done it without encouragement from everyone I know, and without C.S.'s willingness to let it always be "all about me."

Red-Eye Return

Time to put San Francisco and Phoenix in the rearview mirror and head on home, where I'm hoping for dry weather. I missed all the rain and excitement that Tropical Storm Fay produced, but I hear it caused quite a mess. Like a good weatherwoman, J.G. kept me posted on all the necessaries, such as projected paths and rainfall amounts.

Here's the kicker, though. Four years ago, J.G. was about to enter law school when Hurricane What's-Its-Name interrupted plans and forced the cancellation of orientation. Now it's happening all over again to my daughter, who is an entering 1L at Florida. Orientation? Nah-dah. Cancelled.

Oh well. Here we go again. Just when I make it through law school with one, I'm back aboard with another. I'm figuring that, through some form of osmosis, I'll soon know enough law to pass the bar. Who needs the classes? It's a lot more fun, and much less stressful, my way.

Sit and Wait

As I write this, J.G. is in Tampa taking the Florida Bar Exam. It is Day 1 of the two-day event, the culmination of four years of juggling law school with a full-time job. I admire her guts just for making the attempt. But, as a bystander throughout the experience, what struck me most was how much she enjoyed law school and involving herself, even when the hours required were long and hard. She is no slacker. My fingers are crossed that she and her friends are doing well on this difficult exam.

Diploma in Hand (At Last)

The graduation ceremony on May 17th was a delightful, memorable event, but the real event took place yesterday: actual diplomas were available! Because grades are not all in and rankings are not calculated by the time of the ceremony, there is a time lag between when you can walk and when you find out if you really earned your degree.

Fortunately, no glitches for me. They had a diploma with my name on it! It being law school, I had to show my i.d. and sign a receipt before they would hand it over. But it was still a great way to end Week 3 of bar prep.

Running My Own Race

Now that Week 3 of the bar review course is in full swing, I'm finally starting to settle into the routine. The first two weeks I enjoyed the energy of being with my friends and classmates every weekday for four hours. Now I am realizing the downside: one-up-manship is rampant and worry is contagious.

Everyone talks constantly about how many hours a day they are studying, how little they are sleeping, how many practice questions they missed or got right, how far behind they are, how strongly they disagree with the study schedule, all the extra work they are doing, and on and on and on. As just one example, a friend balanced his outline on the steering wheel of his lawnmower this weekend, so he could study it while he was mowing the lawn! (I'm not sure the proverbial Reasonably Prudent Person would do such a thing, but that's another topic.)

All this chatter is completely different from my pattern in law school. As a night student, I barely had time for anything but a quick social conversation. I always studied alone. I never did practice questions. I never wrote practice essays. I just learned the material as thoroughly as I could and did the academic heavy lifting when it was required. When it came time for the exam, I tried to show what I knew. And that method worked fine for me.

So now I am trying to reconnect with that approach: surrender to the process, stay focused, and avoid getting caught up in the constant discussion. I know what I need to do to be ready. Sure, the bar exam is a different animal--all those subjects, all at once!--and very high pressure, because not passing means waiting another six months, minimum, to become a lawyer. But I don't have to get an A. I only need to pass.

BarBri, PMBR and the school's bar prep expert are giving me the tools. I just need to concentrate on getting ready to run my own race.