I Sure Hope I'm Right

I went back to the office this week. It's only two days per week, but it's still a big step for me.

I can do my job perfectly well from home, and the commute is way nicer. My reasons for going back are 1) my supervisor expressed a clear preference for having me return, and 2) almost everyone else is going in at least a few days a week. I don't want to jeopardize my job (although I don't think that's likely -- the firm has been wonderful about supporting us to do what we're comfortable with) and I don't want to ask for "special treatment." I'm a team player and all that.

It felt very strange, when I haven't crossed that threshold since mid-March. I slept terribly Monday night, partly from worry and partly from fear of oversleeping the 4 a.m. alarm that I haven't set since -- naturally! -- mid-March. Things went very smoothly and I met the handful of people we've hired since then. It was lovely to see my colleagues' familiar faces, too.

Of course, we aren't really seeing each other's faces because we're wearing masks, and staying behind closed doors if we have offices, and using one-way corridors, and not congregating to talk in the kitchen or the break areas. 

Being there feels like the right thing to do -- finding that balancing point between what I need and want and what my employer needs and wants. But sharing space and air with 30 other people is a big jump in my exposure and making the leap was pretty nerve-wracking. Everyone is very considerate, and I'm doing what's needed to be careful.  

I hope it's enough.