Heart-Felt Words for Those Who Need Them

Mary Pipher has an impressive resume and the water connection interested me, plus I enjoy the occasional self-help/sociology/cultural anthropology book, all of which made Women Rowing North: Navigating Life's Currents and Flourishing as We Age seem like a good impulse buy.

Plus I am certainly navigating and aging, not to mention determined to flourish, so there's that.

Unfortunately, this book was pretty bland. The water connection was metaphor only (unfortunately). I didn't find Pipher's anecdotal style very compelling. It reminded me of those time management books about how Joe transformed his work life by making sure he did the most important thing first every day. Yeah, okay, so Mary learned she felt better if she got a massage once a week. This is life-changing information?  

I'm fortunate that I've had good mentors along the way, who demonstrated some of these important lessons for me: Decide what's your idea of a good day and then make sure you have one. Push yourself and also be tolerant of your failings. Prioritize what really matters. Don't leave your needs for last, or you'll never get to them. Take some chances. Nothing feels better than authenticity. 

Reading such things in this book might be very helpful for someone who missed out on those mentors. For those women, it's a fine option. I'll definitely be passing this book on via the book swap, to give it a chance to reach the hearts that really need it.

Of course, the exception that proves all this "I didn't need this" mumbo-jumbo was the one passage that really struck me. Here was my message: Staying busy -- too busy with projects and committees and whatnot -- comes from the place of feeling valuable only when you are helpful. Do I need to be useful to justify my existence? Or have I done enough to deserve some pure enjoyment, without having to earn it all the time?

Straight to my heart, that one.  

Excerpt:

Our journey through this life stage, while potentially beautiful, is arduous. Old age is always accompanied by loss. Eventually, one way or another, we will say goodbye to everyone we love. In our sixties and seventies, we are likely to spend more time in doctor's offices than at concerts and more time at funerals than weddings. Maneuvering this stretch of river requires flexibility, a tolerance for ambiguity, openness to new vistas, and the ability to conceptualize all experiences in positive ways. 

Older women have the most need for navigational skills, but we also have the most experience acquiring them. We have weathered strong storms and hold a long view of life's journey. We can take responsibility for the emotional weather we create and experience.

Note: This book counts toward the Mount TBR Reading Challenge.